The room was warm. No one could find me here. Not even Bergen. I didn’t enter the Second Golden Stone. Not yet. I wanted Him.
I walked the length of my Captain’s Quarters on board my Ship. The seas were quiet this evening. I sat down at my desk and sighed, dropping my face into my hands. I wanted to cry. I felt the weight of the day on my shoulders. I would go to sleep and, tomorrow, Bergen and I would continue on to the Second Step.
But for now, I needed my evening with my Imp King.
I pulled out ink well and quill with Parchment. Dipped the tip and began scratching a moment later.
Hello, my dear.
I’m having a hard day. I pulled something in my neck, and I’ve been struggling all day. I was able to settle down into a few new routines today and that was wonderful. I had a meeting that was very fruitful. And I wrote all day. Scheduled several appointments for this week.
I don’t know what to write to you tonight.
I finally realized that I write Non-Fiction in a Fantasy Fiction Style. And… It has given me a sense of significant Order and Calm in my life that I have needed for a long time. I feel like, for the last few months I’ve been drifting at sea without a direction… Trying to figure out my Style and how best this would all fit me. And none of the “Traditional” Ways of doing things fit me.
I felt so frustrated for so long. And I couldn’t talk very well, nor could I articulate what I felt or wanted or saw or dreamed… But bit by bit, it all clicked together. And last night and this morning, I saw my Non-Fiction written in the Fiction Style and also my Summit Festival and my Networking. And now, I can shelve much of my other stuff and just focus now.
And the School I’m building is different. There are no “Classrooms.” Only Philosophers learn that way. Only Discussion and Doing. And… It makes so much sense now. And it’s hard not getting discouraged some days.
I have such BEAUTIFUL friends! True Friends! For they have Listened to my Story so they Know me. And thus, they have chosen me and they Love me. And I’m chosen now. I’m building Colleagues around me and a Community of Ethical, Dedicated people who are working hard to better this world and Nourish others. And we’re growing. We have a Growing Community of Philanthropists, Thinkers, and Ethical dedicated Social Justice Workers all working together.
And I get to do my Philanthropy work and my Psychology and Diplomacy work with my Teaching work and my Philosophy… all while I get to play and write! And FINALLY! It just clicked together these last few days. The way I’m now writing shifts a significant workload off of my shoulders. I no longer have to organize my Writing as it’s already done in One Place now and in Fictional Format, which allows me to “hold” the writing in whatever container I need or want!
And… I also get to become the “Real Life Story Book Character” that I am without having to explain myself to anyone anymore. I get a “get out of Insanity” Free Card, which finally gives me the liberty to be free and true to myself.
I no longer have to worry about… anything really. I can just be me and my true self. I’m hiding with the pages of my own Story.
Disguised as a Fiction.
We’re meant to live in both worlds. We must all Live in Dreams and Play in the Meta. But this shitty world is all backwards because it doesn’t know how to human. So it has everyone throwing away Dreams and Play while we all live and work in the Meta. But I finally found the Way. And so I’m living it. Properly. Naturally. They way we all were meant to live. In Dreams. And the Meta only is meant for Play.
Some day you’ll all come and join me. And then the world will live as One.
I’m tired of being on *this* Journey. It is the Journey of “Finding my Crew.” I was on the Journey of “Building my Ship.” And now, I am ready for the “Attracting People, Building Wealth and Notoriety, and Celebrating Life with my Sunshine Imagination Adventures” Journey.
I want to be travelling the world and attending Fundraisers and Gala Events. I want to be doing Dinners and Sponsoring others with Dreams to Nourish the World. I want to do Public Speaking and Play Events in my Sunshine Imagination Adventures. I want to be Free to move through the World as I want and need so I can just nourish, empower, and serve others.
And I want to do all of this without anyone ever again getting in my way again.
So yes. I’m tired.
I hope you’re well. I miss you.
I love you.
Anna