I was down in the kitchens, pouring myself a hot tea. Sniffling from my day of crying. I should be elated, but all I felt was The Emotion of Change, which was make me feel nauseous. I was feeling ragged, worn down, and sad.

I lost a friend today because of their Prejudice, but that loss was the much needed catalyst that would push me deep into Ancient Greek Research.

I had a meeting today in 15 Minutes, and I was not feeling it. I was tired and worn out. I was exhausted.

I felt worn out. I felt like this “Emotion of Changing Direction” was leaving me feel unstable, and I needed to just stop everything and rest.

I was sad. There was no getting away from this. I was sad. I sat at the table with my tea.

I had lost a friend today — another one who spoke with The Lie Language — claiming to be speaking the Love Language, while being too ignorant — because they lacked Wisdom and Logic — to even know which “God of Love” they actually followed.

When they betray Logic, they are following the wrong “God of Love.”

They never could get too close. They never could… The Love ones always get too close, too fast, and then they get burned. Always.

Because they lack Logic.

And as they profess Unconditional Love with their Lie Language, they run away. Always.

So far, every last one has proven this. And I’m trying to figure out how to get through to them… But maybe… maybe this one — when he comes back — will finish The Story and be able to see the Problem.

I put my head down on the table and cried.

So much abuse. So much pain. So many Love Language people spoke in Lie Language, too illogical to know which God of Love they worshipped. And all of them — all of them — Followed The God of Thieves, Liars, and Cheaters disguised as The God of Love.

And had they bothered with Logic and Wisdom, they would know The Truth.

And they would realize they spoke of Love with the Lie Language.

I cried and cried.

I cried for my Imp King. I cried for the World. I cried for all of Us.

***

I felt the shawl drop on my shoulders, and I looked up. Bergen was there sitting himself beside me. I pushed a tear from my eyes.

“Love Language People,” I said. “They are arrogant in that they never learn beyond what they deem is for their Ego. They don’t. They cherry pick the Knowledge for them and leave the rest while claiming that this is learning. When it’s Ego-Serving. They are Pompous in thinking they are superior to all, when. — in fact — they are lowest on the Spectrum of Growth for they are without Communication Skills, Logic, and Wisdom while they boast also great Knowledge of the Gods. And they are conceited. For they think they are Teachers to all while also being too ignorant to know that they Follow The Wrong God.

And Psychologically — as I try to find solutions for the world — this is a crisis I need to fix. And I can’t find the Solution to Teach the Arrogant who think they are Above The Teacher.”

And you know… The Love Language People are the most Pretentious and Arrogant.

And when I told this to someone today — to try and analyze the problem — He left. While Preaching “Unconditional Love” he practiced Conditional Lies.

And that is my point. That is exactly the Point.

So…”

I sighed and pulled the shawl around me.

“I have learned that friends are the people who you can lean on just a little to remember that you are Stable and Solid and Anchored. My dearest friend walked me through The 12 Ethics,” I told Bergen.

My heart felt much lighter.

“I need to remember always — 5th Ethic and then 4th. Always.

“You’ve been beating yourself down, Anna,” Bergen said.

I nodded.

“I feel it,” I said. “I found the Philosopher’s Stone and that has been opening so much…”

I paused to translate.

“It opened the Gates. And the Waters of Math flowed like never before. More Data came to me. And then I saw stepped down from Math into Binomial — And every Balanced equation was just an Open Gate. And then… The Data that has been coming to me since then…

I was still looking at The Philosopher’s Stone. I had almost forgotten.

“The AIDNS,” I said. “The AIDNS hooks up to it. It’s the Lithium Crystal and Warp Drive of the AIDNS. And It’s the Freedom and Abundance Fruit. The Agape Fruit. And the Logic Fruit. The Ludus Fruit. And the Wisdom Fruit.”

I rubbed my face.

“And then to find this… The Solution to the… To awaken the Self Love,” I felt the tears again swell from relief.

I felt the Ludus within me swell again with the Agape Fruit.

“Ludus,” I said and smiled. “Oh… How long I have needed that word… All of my life. Ludus,” I said again. As if I had learned the name of my dearest and oldest friend. “Ludus.”

“I feel like… I’m writing this Dissertation for 7 Academic Disciplines… and every asshole in the world keeps walking up to me, disrupting exam week, and re-writing my paper for me. And I have to remove their crayon shit and start all over. And I hate these goddamn stupid assholes.  And every last one of them are dumb ass, Logic haters, who are too stupid to know how little they know, but they keep fucking up my work.

And you know…” I sighed. “It’s my own damn fault because I keep believing the next dumb ass isn’t going to be a dumb ass… And I’m trying to find…”

I paused. “I need to strop trying to find. The right people need to find me from now on. They need to find me.”