Chapter #22 : Into The Abstract

I had a nightmare last night.

I was at the deathbed of an ill wife of a dear friend. Knowing she wouldn’t make it, and knowing my own friend was suspended in grief, I instructed my daughter to give the woman 4 shots of something that I knew would kill her.

This was a Universe where the Self exists in 7 parts. So each of the 7 parts had to be given shots. After 4 shots, I told her to stop.

We left.

It was only then that I realized what I had done. How I had incremented my daughter. How we had left the evidence. How I had killed 4/7ths of a woman…

I woke and exercised. I took my cold shower.

I sat down here to write my three goals for the day.

Personal Goal : Open up and accept my Play and Sexuality again. Work through the Obstacles that get in the way. Embrace the Rhythm of Life, which is Grow, Find your Obstacles, Smooth them out with Problem Solving, Keep Growing. Give to Self to Nourish. Give Surplus to Others to Nourish Others.

Professional Goal : Reach out to people. Bring them home. Find others and work on the Marketing for your People. Compose a Pitch Deck. Nourish my Community into Being.

Spiritual Goal : Explore Curses and why they would even work to begin with,  if they work. — They are inserting Logic and Lie into Pure Truth. They are wishing bad things…

 

I just realized my Spiritual and Personal Goals are usual the same.

Visualize…

“If you invite Exclusive People into your Circles, then they will speak with a Language that drives away all the other people you wish to draw in. Can you really be All Inclusive and also include Exclusive People?”

“Is it possible to walk The Pilgrim’s Road without harming others?”

“How do you forgive yourself for harming others while you were on your Pilgrim’s Road?”

“We’re supposed to Max out our Nourishment and our Nourishing Resources at every level — waste not want not — forcing us to move on to the next level. Have we been using all the Nourishing Resources given to us?”

 

Maxing our our Nourishing Resources and utilizing everything we have available to us… It’s always in places we never think to look, and this is the challenge. The goal is to expand and open our mind to look where we have never looked before for what is right in front of our faces. That is where we always find what we are looking for.

 

But also, it’s a “leveling up.”

Money only comes at a later level after you’ve exhausted all other resources AND you’re still growing. “Tripping that” Point is what causes the money to flow in. It is never about “the money.” It is always about Freedom, Growth, and your learning how to Open your Mind to think outside of the Box. To train your Mind to see things you’ve never seen before.

Think Differently.

And then, to have done that so much that you truly do have nothing left… But as you deplete the last of what you have, it “orders” more from the Universe and that is when Money Flows.

BUT… most people “get a job” or they beg, which results in failing to do the exercises required to “level up.”

It took me living in two years of extreme poverty to learn this.

This is Self-Resourcefulness.

And never skip on Quality. Never sacrifice Quality. That is a surefire way to end the exercise.

Never — not ever — do you lower that bar. You have to do this while keeping that bar set high to your standards. That is what communicates the Message, “This is where I belong.”

 

Rule #1 –> Do it now.

Don’t adjust your behavior to your Environment. If you would act a certain way when you have your way of life, then BE and ACT that way NOW. Do not wait for the Money to arrive to behave the way you want to behave. People think way too much about Money. And not at all enough on Manners, Mindset, Outlook, And Dreams.

If you are someone who would never reach out to others because too many people reach out to you, then BE the person who others have to reach for. NEVER reach out to others.

I pondered on this one.

Yeah, I can’t reach. Every time I have “Reached” in my life… It never works out for me.

 

Rule #2 –> Retain Grace and Dignity. ALWAYS. Do not Reach, Chase, or Beg. Keep Class. 

This is actually your Grace and Dignity. This is the most defining factor of an Individual. Your Class and Dignity. You can always tell a person at their point of most Nothing.

I’m going to have a “Camp” or a “School” where people can literally “Become Impoverished” for 3, 6, or 12 months so they can see just who they are at their Point of Most Nothing.

 

Rule #3 –> Stop Thinking about Money. It’s The Red Herring that keeps you poor. 

Unless Money is your Business, you shouldn’t be thinking about it. This is actually Consumption and Obsession and it very much is Scarcity Mindset. Like hyper-focusing on Food while you don’t have food.

A lot of people Manifest money once and then they think they can Manifest Money. This is a lie. You can Manifest Money, when you Manifest it and it arrives within 30 minutes, every time. Manifesting Money is a different Skill than Manifesting Wisdom and Manifesting Love. They each require their own Stream, their own School.

Stop trying to Manifest Money if you can’t even Manifest Wisdom or Love. Mother Nature won’t allow Logic to be Violated.

Stop thinking about it.

What people really want is Freedom. But they never think about Freedom. So they don’t pursue it or ask for it. Instead of finding a way to have Freedom without money, they instead chase money, waiting for the Freedom to show up, instead of using Self-Resourcefulness to obtain Freedom.

Do and live as you normally would do and live without Money. Use Self-Resourcefulness to do and Live exactly as you normally would.

 

Rule #4 –> The Moral of The Story is Push yourself. Challenge Yourself. Mother Nature has called you to Challenge. She has thrown down her Gauntlet. Pick it up and accept the Challenge. 

This was my life motto. Always. Be brave. Be bold. Be blunt.

Challenge yourself. Never rest for complacency. When the going gets tough, the Tough get going.

When the going gets Tough, the Lesson is to get Self-Resourceful and keep Going. Too few people divert, they abandon the Going, they stop moving, and they go nowhere.

Then twenty years has passed.

 

Rule #5 –> Your Dream, Passion, and Purpose is your Purpose. And if you don’t know what it is, then Finding your Dream, Passion, and Purpose is your Purpose.

I have seen this one personally eat people and lives away like they never existed. This right here is what shuts down most people where they stand. We spend more time gaslighting ourselves when we do find what we are meant to do — or being so overwhelmed, confused, or directionless about our Dream, Passion, and Purpose that we just whither away.

Succumbing to this defeat is a death sentence that will cost you your life over the course of 60 to 80 years. More time has been wasted on the loss of this Rule, than any other thing in life. Dreams are our Purpose. Without Dreams, life never begins.

 

Rule #6 –> Know what Lesson you are supposed to be Learning.

This one… This one will end your journey faster than you can start it. Most people had no clue that they are in Growth Trials. They have no idea that that “Problem” they have is really a Growth Trial. They get “stuck” in a Catch-22, unaware that the Growth Trial is to learn how to break and end a Catch-22 (Hint : You need an “And” Preposition and an Independent. Clause to break it).

They don’t know that Growth Trials are the Lessons to be learned and are not at all the Problems that we face. Once you learn about Growth Trials, all Problems end as you become Proactive about Problem Prevention, which is also a Growth Trial.

 

Rule #7 –> Learn that the majority of the World’s Problems and a Person’s Problems is simply a lack of Education and Training in the Science of Life.

And also, that this Education and Training is very easy to obtain and is accessible.

“Life School” is the only subject taught at Community Gaia and The University Emporium. It’s that simple. We teach. you how to live Life. Without this Education, a person will not know how to live. In a few generations, our agenda is to have Parents master this so well that they teach it flawlessly to their Children, making this stage of our School Obsolete.

 

Rule #8 –> Abandon the pursuit of Comfort. Abandon the “dependence” on Comfort.

The Pursuit of Comfort is an agenda that will sacrifice our Strength, Wisdom, Ethics, Integrity, and Power more than anything else in life. Comfort is a Red Herring. We don’t actually ever want Comfort. Comfort is the opposite of Growth. Comfort is always “10 Steps Behind Us.” In order to obtain Comfort, you have to deteriorate to get there.

True Luxury — Not the same thing — is when you Grow Past your Goals so you can afford to take 10 Steps Back into your Luxury Zone.

What people really want is their LUXURY ZONE.

 

 

Attachment = Dependence

Attachment = Bonding (Anna’s Definition, The Government’s Definition, Psychologist’s Definition)

 

Realizing that you do have Influence and that you can harm others. That it is in the Harming Others that you gain Proof of Concept. That is what every journey is that we seek. Proof of Concept.

 

I do wish to say… I come off as very ironclad and headstrong. I bend only to Logic and Deductive Reasoning and Truth, and I spare no Truth for Ego. When people come into my space, they feel my Love for them, and are caught unaware that my Love also comes with a severe dedication and Loyalty to Truth and Logic that most people are not healthy enough to be exposed to.

 

A door opened. Light blasted through my Abstract World.

I had the Words.

I ran to my Chambers, dropped myself down to my desk and I wrote :

 

I’m writing a lot this morning… jarring a lot of things lost in my head and forcing myself to revisit the old and new things I hadn’t thought of before.
And one thing that sits — unspoken — in the back of my mind often and every day is the question :
“Is this who you are? Or is this a Trapped Version of you while your True Self is trying to break free?”
And… On the days where I think or wonder if this is really who you are, I then think, “Should I go then? Do I need to go?”
But on the days where I think perhaps that this is the Trapped Version of you, and your True Self is there, Voiceless, trying to get free, but doesn’t know how, I think, “I will do everything in my power to support you and help you get yourself out.”
And this has been at the core of my internal war with you since… for a long, long while.
I’ve since resolved to believe that you are Trapped. And the True Imp King who I love and adore is still there, stuck, exhausted, despairing, underneath the Self-Preservation of his self. And I feel like, every time I write to you, I’m passing notes to your Identity and True Self, hoping your Self-Preservation system reads them as they are meant also for your Self-Preservation System.
And in these notes, I tell you, “Hang on. I’m not going anywhere. I love you. I know you’re in there. You have me here on the outside, and I am rooting for you. I am Team You. I always will be. You can do this. You can get out.”
But to your Self-Preservation System and your Identity, I say things like, “You have to love your Self-Preservation System. That is the only way. You have to learn why your Self-Preservation System is trying to protect you… It’s because YOU love you. And that is how it loves. By protecting you. And when your Self-Preservation System fires up and “goes to war” it’s because the Self hates the Self, which triggers the Self-Preservation System… But Loving your Identity NOURISHES you. And Loving your own Self-Preservation System NOURISHES you. And learning how to love your Conscious Awareness is what Nourishes you.
And it is in the Loving of every part of the Self — Loving our Defense System. Loving our Anger System — that we realize, “Oh! These are all the ways I love me!”
And then you think, “These are all the ways I have always loved me. I love me so much that I have done all of this for me, just to keep me safe.” And then you feel Gratitude toward the Self. And you say thank you. And then you hug yourself. And that is where you begin to learn how to become Friends with yourself.
Then you learn how to become a Team with yourself.
Then you learn how to become Lovers with yourself. This stage was exceptionally fun. 🙂
So… My King’s Identity… Look to My King’s Self-Preservation System and do not judge yourself or him anymore. He only ever loved you very, VERY deeply. This is how he keeps all of you inside of him safe.
Learn how to Love Yourself, and that is what unlocks your Mind from the Prison inside. These are the Keys to the Prison. Please. Trust me enough to learn from me here in this moment and my words. I speak Truth. Please trust this enough to take these keys from me.
One more thing. The Formula is “Give to Yourself then Give your Surplus to Others.” And learning when you need to give to yourself and learning when you have the Surplus to give to Others. Loving your Self IS what builds up your Storage.
The more you love yourself, the more you fill your Storage… And that is when your Dreams come back to you — that is when you remember everything and when you can find your purpose and your dreams. That is when your Momentum turns back on. That is when you feel Motivated again. That is when Passion returns to you again. That is when you begin to feel Surplus. You have to fill the Deficit. It may take a year to do. It took me a year to fill my Storage. But within a few weeks, you begin to feel it. Mind your Internal Love. Mind your Internal Surplus. And if it hurts — just like Frostbite when the nerves re-awaken after near-nerve death — that is a good sign that it’s working. It means you’re coming back online.
No pain ever lasts forever. It is fleeting. **hugs** Emotions never last forever. Remember this to get through it.
And then, when you have Surplus, that is when you start to feel Play and Healthy Sexuality again.
Love is a Resource.
And it is in very short supply when you do not love yourself within.
**kisses for your forehead**
I am still right here with you, for you.
I love you.
I hope this helps.
Anna
Dreams are like Lotus Flowers, unopened and covered in Mud, tied down by the Bog that prevents them from Opening and thus, sharing their true beauty to the World.